SAGE ADVICE

March 1, 2013

SAGE ADVICE: MEAN GIRL

DEAR SAGE: There is this girl in my grade and she is so mean to me! She talks behind my back, she laughs at whatever I do! When I saw her at pinkberry a frozen yogurt place she acted so nice because my mom was there.  She is so popular so everybody likes her. Now she turned everybody against me. What should I do?

DEAR NICE GIRL: I am sorry to hear this! Unfortunately, this type of situation can happen all throughout life because the girl you describe is probably very unhappy. Because she is not happy with herself, she tries to make you miserable too. You may never understand why she is unhappy and treating you poorly, but that is okay. What you can control is how you react to her.

My advice is that the best thing you can do is to smile when she laughs at you and simply walk away. Don’t let her actions control you! Bullies may have some attention for a while, but eventually, people will want to spend their time with someone who is nicer. So you should focus on being your wonderful self and not worry about this mean girl!

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February 22, 2013

SAGE ADVICE: REGAINING CONTROL

DEAR SAGE: My life has been speeding by and a lot of changes are occurring and I feel like I am losing control. I have recently made a few bad decisions in my love life and I don’t know if I should be honest about my mistakes or live with the guilt I face.

DEAR FLOWER: This is serious. I can feel your anxiety. I received your letter and literally stopped everything because I want to help you find peace. So before we get started, I want you to please pause everything and take a deep breathe with me [long inhale, hold it…then long exhale]. Slow everything down and allow yourself to relax in this moment. Keep breathing slowly and consciously with me while we work through this. Ok, let’s do it!

Sometimes life really does flying by when we lose connection with our purpose and goals. What are you really trying to do? Where are you really trying to go? What is it that you really want? Despite all of the things going on, take a step back and first reflect on these questions. You can either let change control you or control the changes. When we get lost, sometimes it can feel like we are swept up in a wave and tossed in different directions outside of our control. The reality is that when we don’t have a goal, the waves really do determine our direction. If we know where we want to go, we can start swimming in that direction. You are on the right path because you realize you don’t want to keep floating along. So right now, it’s time to swim to shore, my dear.  Let’s get you grounded and address your key concern: your love life…

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February 16, 2013

SAGE ADVICE: WEIGHT LOSS

DEAR SAGE:  When I was younger, I was able to eat whatever I wanted and the weight would magically melt off! Now that I’m a little older, that magic is gone. I try everything, but I just can’t seem to lose weight and keep it off. I get sucked in by every magazine cover that promises to help you lose 10 pounds in a week. It never really works out. Please help me to get out of this weight loss merry-go-round!

DEAR DIETER: Thank you for your question! This is a huge subject of great importance…for in this life, we only have one body and our livelihood is dependent on how well we take care of it. I think the real issue here is that the focus has become on weight loss instead of having a healthy lifestyle.

So you’re right…thinking about weight loss is a lot like a merry-go-round! You will have ups and downs and feel like you’re spinning round and round, but not getting anywhere. Getting off the ride involves re-evaluating your habits and making some different decisions. Let’s begin!

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February 10, 2013

SAGE ADVICE: YOUNG LOVE

DEAR SAGE: Ok so at the beginning of the school year, I developed a crush on the boy in my class. So I told my best friend. She had also developed a crush on the same guy! But she never told me until a couple weeks ago! So a couple weeks ago, I heard that the boy that I had a crush on was gonna ask my best friend out!!!!! And guess what she said…. YES!!!!!!

So after she said yes, I got really mad at her because she knew that I had a huge crush on him!!! I really don’t trust her as a friend anymore! But she has done so many more things that really hurt my feelings! it’s not just this incident!!! I don’t know what to do… I REALLY LIKED HIM!!!!!! :( :( :( :( :*

DEAREST LOVE: O.M.G! This is a tricky situation! Let me ask you a question…what would have happened if your crush asked you out and you said yes? What would that have been like for your friend? It is dangerous business to base a friendship on which one of you the guy picks! Someone is going to lose in that situation. True friendships are based on how you treat each other…it should not be about people outside of your friendship. Crushes come and go, best friends are true friends that are there for you through all of that!

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February 5, 2013

SAGE ADVICE: DREAMER

DEAR SAGE: Greetings. One of my greatest issues is putting things off and never see the “yield” of great ideas and promise. I can’t seem to stay excited or motivated to see things through. So my question is: Am I self sabotaging? Am I lacking confidence? Or am I just plain lazy? I have a wealth (literally) of ideas but can’t seem to get them from my head to fruition! I pray I’m not a lost cause. Thank you in advance for your response.

DEAR DREAMER: You are not a lost cause! And you are not alone in this struggle! And I thank you for bravely identifying and communicating this area of opportunity for yourself. I suspect that your dreams are so big that you may have a hard time knowing where to start. Here’s my advice for you: first start a dream journal and record all of those brilliant ideas! Take some quiet time out to record all of your genius. Write out everything! No matter how crazy and impossible it seems. Next, take a look at all of your great ideas and pick the easiest one! Yes…the EASIEST!

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