DEAR SAGE: I had a craving for unhealthy, fattening, non nutritious food today.  I went to Whole Foods and bought a pint of ice cream, a small kosher pound cake (not that Kosher makes a big difference in calorie count) and a chocolate bar.   When I got home, i nearly ate all of it…well, i haven’t opened the chocolate bar.  But if it wasn’t for me accidentally flinging a large scoop of the ice cream on the floor, i probably would have finished the entire pint.   I also didn’t finish the poundcake…but not because i was practicing any type of discipline…if i took another bite i would have thrown up.  ugh…why do i do things like this?  Please help.

DEAR OVER-EATER: I know how you feel! I have been guilty of this same type of behavior! I do not consider those to be my proudest moments, but at the time, my focus was on eating all of the wrong things…and it tasted great! For a brief moment. So I’m proud of you for going for the pint [instead of the gallon] and the small cake [instead of the family size]! And that large scoop falling to the floor was probably your subconscious slowing you down haha Let’s try to get to the heart of the matter:

The reality is that eating is closely tied to our emotions and hormones. I can speak for women and say that we have a particularly difficult time every month when we experience hormonal changes. And when our emotions [men or women: related to relationships, work, and life] go through changes, our mind tells us that food can provide comfort and make us feel better. Of course, this does not really happen, but we feel strongly that it will. The instant gratification that comes from bad food can frighteningly add 5 pounds to our bodies for 5 seconds of taste! [What a rip off!]

So the key here is to outsmart yourself. If you can, try to eat something filling [even if it’s a protein bar or a piece of fruit] before you dig into the sweets. And if you still have an urgent craving, buy the smallest size possible and give-away [or even throw away] at least half! Because we are “programmed” as children to clean our plates, we are often not mentally satisfied until everything is gone…and then we realize our stomach is overly full after we stop! Try to control your portion size up front so that you reduce the risk of this result.

My dear, even the most stringent eating programs often advocate a “cheat day” to account for our emotional ties to food. So do not allow yourself to be overcome with guilt! Allowing yourself to give in a little, no more than once per week [in moderation!] can be a great way to motivate yourself to exercise and eat healthy during the other days of the week. As you find more and more healthy alternatives [e.g. fruit and sweet veggies instead of candy], you will have less occasion to need those cheat days. Regular exercise and meditation will also give you those positive endorphines to boost your mood without food! As we talked about in the bliss post (, we try to gain happiness through the body, but it is not possible. True happiness comes from awareness of our divinity, appreciating our joys, and living an authentic life (filled with prayers of thanks and meditation to connect with our divinity)!

YOU ARE BEAUTIFUL! You have all you need to maintain a healthy lifestyle! YOU ARE DIVINE! And you are totally forgiven for your cheat day! You are on the right path to separate happiness and food associations to get to a higher level of consciousness…where happiness is tied to your joyful state of mind and the presence of Heaven within you!

Every day gives us a new day to put our health first! So get rid of that chocolate bar and go for a run! Then shower and meditate on all of the joys in your life! ;)


Love and light,

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