“Knowing is not enough, we must APPLY. Willing is not enough, we must DO.” -Bruce Lee I appreciate this wisdom from Bruce Lee because it gets to the heart of everything. The goal of the site is to share wisdom and also to provide advice/suggestions as to how you can apply the lessons in your – Read More –
DEAR SAGE: I happen to have the privilege of knowing you personally (which is why I didn’t include my email) and I want to tell those that don’t know you that you are the real deal! I’ve never known anyone to have such a consistent positive attitude (and be no-nonsense when needed) and somehow know – Read More –
One of the main causes of our suffering is the seed of anger inside of us. It’s not healthy to keep your anger inside for long (never for more than a day). Accept your anger because you know, you understand, that you can take care of it; You can transform it into positive energy. Remember, – Read More –
Perhaps it is the scientist in me, but recently I have conducted a few (human) reactivity experiments. They are rather simple…I say something mildly controversial that I know the person may not like and just observe how they react. The different levels of response are amazing! The three broad categories of response I’ve found are: – Read More –
“Any kind of abuse, God knows, is a crime. She won’t have a second try…open up your heart, as well as your eyes.” On the topic of gender violence, I could not stop myself from sharing this other very important song/video. I want to point out that saying something can mean a simple 911 call – Read More –
I do not believe there are any accidents. Just after I made the last post about self-love in the face of an abusive situation, I viewed this video shared by a friend (Thanks, N!). It is a BRILLIANT discussion about gender violence and how it does not just effect women…it effects everyone, men included. Jackson Katz – Read More –
Last night, I received a call from a friend who is also a supporter of the site (thank you!). She asked me an important question, “Selena…you write a lot of great content about having control over yourself regardless of what other people do. I’m in a relationship that doesn’t make me happy, where I am – Read More –
“He did each single thing as if he did nothing else.” – Charles Dickens So often in life, we get pulled in multiple directions. Or we allow our mind to wander and run through old events that don’t matter anymore or future events that are just an illusion. I appreciate this quote from Dickens because – Read More –
I am so intrigued by the concept of watching your thoughts because I truly believe it is the path to peace. I always find this difficult to describe in words, but it’s the process of stepping back outside of yourself and looking down onto your mind. You watch your thoughts go by without getting attached to them. You stop becoming so reactive to your fears (one of my favorite definitions for the word being: false expectations appearing real) and stop reacting so forcefully during those moments when you replay or process someone else’s words or actions as being disrespectful (especially if you feel that immediate increase in your heart rate!)…and you stop believing everything you think.
When you watch your thoughts, you don’t judge or attach yourself to those worries, angers, or desires that keep coming up. You simply watch and, in doing so, take away the mind’s control over all of your feelings and emotions. You operate from a stronger place…from your true Self…your center…and you stop the constant waves of emotion and turmoil that you often allow your mind to create. Because your thoughts trigger your emotions which often manifest physically, when you cut off your thoughts from the start, you interrupt the entire ripple effect.
We don’t even realize how similar we can be to that person that seems “crazy” walking down the street talking to themselves about a bunch of random topics that don’t seem to make any sense. From the news, to the baseball game, to their sibling, to the weather, to dinner, to their job, to a financial fear, to a material desire, and on and on. Often, we are doing the same thing, only it happens in our minds and we are just not saying every unconnected thought out loud. What I’m talking about here is stopping that unproductive chatter by paying less attention to everything you’re thinking.
When you watch your thoughts, you remove the focus on each individual thought that comes up in your mind. You allow your mind to become unfocused and blurry…you know that you’re thinking things but you can’t seem to focus on any one thing. It takes time and practice, but eventually you reach a place of silence. It is a pretty amazing thing because you can literally take control of yourself by simply watching your thoughts…by not attaching yourself or your energy to any single thought. It is a way of being in flow and realizing that things come to us when we do what is natural…our thoughts about a thing really didn’t create it. It was only through action..or really non-action (doing things so naturally as if we really did not do anything…like breathing!)…that everything came to pass. There was never anything to worry about or fear…and any time or energy spent with those negative emotions was wasted. So we find peace by training ourselves to take our thoughts less seriously.
In matters of the mind, I always love to reference Osho. He explains it this way:
Normally, I allow the Zen or Sufi stories I post to stand alone without commentary. However, I feel the previous Zen story (A Game of Chess) carries with it many important lessons beyond just compassion and concentration. The less obvious lesson that I would like to point out stems from the master’s comment to the – Read More –